Part 2- Your Character suck dick and not in a good way

Back with another rant, and this one is important. Characters, the main dkjsdfgsf of your story. They make things understandable, create situations, make drama, just sheer make a story. If your characters suck dick then your story sucks as well.

First of all, a character (not your little celebrity, don't get me started on their characterization quite yet) is made up or based off of someone you know. Most stories have extreme characters, and they make stories interesting. Sometimes, extreme goes too far. There should be a basic principal for characters that everyone follows.

The basics

1. Original from other stories
2. Clearly different from other characters (As long as the reader isn't confusing one person for another then it should be fine. Give them something that defines them. Idols do it all the time. In music videos one is blonde, one wears a different shirt, one is shirtless, one wears a skirt. There is something that stands out. I wouldn't mind reading that your character wears a butterfly on their cheek everyday or they have the strangest eyeshadow. It's when reading that all the characters wear the same thing that it is hard, like in a school environment or a working environment. At that time give them a personality difference. This half of the class is hard working, these are sporty, these are stupid or lazy. You can pull different people into the story. Just the same, people share several qualities so their can be like interests. The main character doesn't have to be a leader, they can be a follower. The love interest doesn't have to be knock dead gorgeous, just someone that catches the main character's eye. Make it easy for your readers to know who is who, make them stand out, even in those subtle ways.)
3. plays their respective parts (an antagonist is an antagonist, they are there to play the villain. The hero will be the hero. Don't switch them around and make things stupid. That girl likes that guy and he likes her, don't make him an ass, please, you can't handle writing that, you fuck it up too easily and make it corny and stupid. STUPID. Also, don't make characters up for the fun of it. Don't pop them in and give them an important part at the randomest of times. That is just as STUPID. I feel like I am watching or reading an old mystery and at the very end it was revealed that the butler was the culprit, please, cliche. Maybe an old woman on the side of the road giving advice, that is fine, leave her nameless please. Don't give names to people that have no role. Just think of it like a drama series. It takes you a whole episode or two to remember the main character's names, why would you want to remember the extras? Do you try and memorize their names? It's even harder to remember extras in stories since we can't see their faces. Bring in those extra characters for a chapter, two tops, and never bring them up again because they are EXTRAS!  write about them in a sequel if you like the character so much.)
4. flaws (one of my big pet peeves. A character is too perfect, or too flawed. Tell me a real person that sucks ass so much in real life, tell me a person that is so amazing in real life.  They don't exist! I can't think of  a single person that is so perfect that they are SSDLTKHS LK HKHJ! Makes me angry just thinking of perfect characters. I don't care what the flaw is *not that much* but at least give them one. I'm tired of reading the same story again and again with that perfect man that is too awesome for you. He is good at sports, he is good in school, he is good at sex *what!* he is good with music and art and working and caring and with kids. This man is so good he must be GOD! That is what your perfect characters are, God! Even if just a little, give him an insecurity to make him not so perfect. Same thing with the anti perfect characters. Not all characters were born as orphans (which means their parents are dead, stop confusing them with the foster kids that got abandoned stupid* they can live happily. Parents don't die everyday. Not all kids are bullied or raped. It's not uncommon, but would all that happen to one person? Apparently it can. These are the people that are sadistic and love torturing their characters so much that they would take a knife to their throats and let their blood leak out to get readers *I know I would * That makes me chipper and all, but something other than their love should make them not so unlucky and flawed. *why do I always get aodfh hfdfhdhdhryw barymkiifh before this saves?* I will be writing this for the third time so please bear with my anger. Okay, I remember this better because I just wrote it. Flaws... there are many you can use, be creative. Anorexia, picks nose, bulimia, smokes, can't spell shit, poor, fat, bad eyesight, acne, can't sing, looks terrible in purple, very fruity *for those girls that like to make their ukes total girls and that is retarded* crazy, mental disorder- that covers a lot, insecurities PLEASE USE INSECURITIES! Jealousy *I might stab you if you use that* Because jealousy is stupid as well. Learn to trust and move on PLEASE! Same with anger. GET YOUR BORDERLINE/ BIPOLAR/ SCHIZOPHRENIC ASS INTO THE HOSPITAL AND GET SOME MEDS! Fuck your anger, you need counseling, now! Anger is what immature people have. Sigh, just use your parents as an example for flaws because they are completely open to you. *On a side note, parents are not happy all the time and you will NOT get along with them as best friends on average. They are family and you have fights with them. They get stressed from work and they don't want to deal with your shit. Please keep that in mind when writing about parents.* Strangers will hide things from you but your parents reveal all their secrets. Bringing me to the next one, again...) 
5. private vs. public (It's like coming out of the closet.  *I get better at writing this every time* We are not the same person with friends as we are alone. We sing in the shower and we try to show off. The person we are with our friends is not a badass wannabe. Our friends would leave us if we treated them like trash. *I am trying so hard to leave that person on the street!* We grovel at some point for their forgiveness for something. We can act like a total fool in private and come out perfectly normal *define normal* with other people. *The act of rolling around on our beds fangirling* Different people and different environments make us act differently. In reality, people have the ability to act in any manner. Hard to admit yes, but there is a slut in all of us somewhere inside. Drawing your character's real self out is your job as a writer. Secrets are what make them real. Remember, school is formal environment, no character swearing and sex talk. Home is with family, keep in pg7 or something. Having the character's real face appear with the love interest is wonderful, but do keep in mind how hard it is to reveal those dirty little secrets. It is very hard. we are in no hurry to say our INSECURITIES out loud, but they will show up. Revelations should be thought out, but not drawn out. Readers will often tell you to hurry up, and when that happens, tell them to suck it cuz it is your story. Your story... In fact, if the two faced character is big enough, if it plays an important role, then you don't even have to say that things are fake. Most of the time the public side is very real and is part of the character to the point that those fake smiles aren' t fake. Even then, we don't need to be told that something isn't real. The reader should be able to understand when something is being said because of oh my phajigals! If they don't get it they are STUPID. I feel sorry for the stupid readers and the writers with the stupid readers. *Phajigals, spelling unknown, is the underpart of your neck* So think of a classroom, there are jocks, goths, emos, preps, nerds, slackers... now think of your character as all of the above in some manner. Take a quality from everywhere and throw it in, but please stick to one as your main personality. Your slacker can be lazy as hell, but they can try hard at skateboarding. That sort of thing. Nerds can skip a class if something more important comes up. *By the way, skipping marks a character as such a rebel, in real life. Smoking, acohol, sex, dating, those are normal things that teachers and adults can't really control, but there are consequences for some of these things* Characters don't need a completely opposite personality for their private face, it just needs to be something they wouldn't do in public. Even if it is just picking their nose and talking to themselves, do something. It brings depth to the character.)
6. changes (Let me tell you a story about myself. I have hated this kid since we were in 3rd grade. *My third time writing this* we got is so many fights our teachers finally separated us so that we were never in the same classes. By the time we got to high school, we hadn't spoken for several years. One morning our freshman year we sat at the same table waiting to be dismissed to class. We didn't say anything, but the hate was still there. We didn't kick each other or hit backs with books *I'll admit I did both frequently* and we actually held a decent conversation. *We ignored each other and talked to our friends respectively* I still want to write his name in a Death Note, but he isn't at the top of my list. *That spot is held by a black chick, not really bringing race up though, but asians hold my heart* I don't know if we just grew up *that can't be it* or if we just hadn't had anything to fuel our hatred for so many years. *The guy didn't even recognize me at first!* After being apart for so long I had no reason to hate him, but it was engraved into me from my deep and real feelings towards him. *No, my hatred will never turn into love, I hate him that much and it disgusts me.* I sometimes don't get why there are stories where hate turns into love because I would never do that. Maybe I just don't have enough experience. I can totally see love turning into hate *points at divorced parents out there* but not really the other way around. The reason is because we as humans judge others. There is that saying that we shouldn't judge a book by its cover *that's the only way I know what to read so whatever* but we do it anyway. We hate to admit it, but people make first impressions, and they last a lifetime. My first impression of a person can stay forever and I might not want to change it because it is my nature to hope that I am right about a person. I hope that I have judged wisely and not made friends with a total druggie, even if they are a kind person. We can't change our perception on people easily. It's different from making an initial, "That person might be good friends with me some day." That changes easily. As soon as the first impression really comes into play then it is hard to change. Remember that when your character starts having sex with the person they were raped by. REMEMBER THAT. I will point out the key word GRADUAL. Meaning it happens over time and there were several leading factors to your character changing. One big shock doesn't cut it for me, those are STUPID. Maybe in special circumstances, like you get shot in the market and you hold a fear of shopping for a while, but you can get over that with help. Gradual and quick changes together. So I'll point out the key word again, GRADUAL. Never disrespect the ALMIGHTY KEY!)
7. doesn't follow stereotypes (If I read another story about a girl that is infatuated with the color pink I will stab my computer and laugh manically! Girls are not all sluts *for those yaoi writers* and we don't all act like 12 year olds. *I haven't acted like one since I was 8* Some of us hate wearing dresses, we hate being outshone by others, even guys, some of us can't cook. Look at yourself. I know we make the main character like us ever so slightly *I used to write my perfect self as the main character, never for fics though* but our immature thoughts need to be left out. Sarcasm is loved, but brats are not. Remember the public and private and the flaws. Girls are everything from understanding to completely bitchy. There are those that will care for you like mothers, and those that are mothers. *classmate had a baby just last week* Some will walk around in their converse till the sun is rising and some will spend an hour on make up. They are all different, and make them even more different. Just as not all white people are spoiled and fat, Europeans aren't snooty, Indians *don't look at me, I am a total stereotype* and Asians are all smart, Hispanics like siestas, Blacks are violent and all in gangs and equally stupid. *I happen to have some black DUDES in my AP classes* Guys aren't all about sex *at least I hope not* and some really do think about feelings. *but the guy I am thinking of is gay, so I'm not too sure on that one* Girls do check out guys just as much as the inverse, and girls also check out other girls, the same way with people. *human nature to size each other up* I'll also point out that not all gays are fruity. Half or more than half are masculine. *Some like to top just as much as they bottom* Homosexuals by definition only like people of the same gender. Being gay doesn't mean they work in fashion and they stress about their looks. *If they do work in fashion then go for it.* Stereotypical characters are what turns off readers. They often hate those little actions that you think are amazing. That shout, that fight, they are all expected and hated. I don't know, flip your character upside down and write about them then, just don't confuse readers.)

I guess I am just trying to say that authors need to DEVELOPE their characters more!